Goodbye, Love
by spidermonkey17
Summary: He loved her. She loved him. What happens when fate decides it's time for change? OCC All Human.
1. Goodbye, Love

**So, I'm trying to finish **_**Famous Last Words**_**, and…it's not working. I wrote this a while back without Twilight in mind, hence all "she/he-ness" I understand that this is choppy and repetitive, but this is how it came to me. So, please enjoy and review. **

"Two to one Static to the sound of you and I Undone for the last time, And there this was, Hiding at the bottom of your Swimming pool some September, And don't you think I wish that I could stay, Your lips give you away I can hear it, the jet engine. Through the center of the storm. And I'm thinking I'd Prefer not to be rescued" Jack's Mannequin "Rescued"

**Goodbye Love**

"No!" he roared.

She flinched back in fear and hurt. "Please…just one. Before you go," she said, brokenly.

"I can't," his voice broke as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Why are you doing this? Just…please. Why?"

"I don't… I don't have to explain myself to you. You're with him," he jabbed.

She shut her eyes slowly and tried to breath with no success. She felt his hand on her cheek and she leaned into his touch, a habit. She shook as he stroked her face and she smiled as she felt the shock his fingers brought with them.

She opened her eyes to see his dark orbs hooded with anguish. He ripped away from her and he took her breath with him. She stumbled behind him and dropped her head to his back as he stopped abruptly. She grabbed his shoulder and caressed his hair.

"Goodbye love," she whispered brokenly.

That was all it took. He tore away from her and ran.

She held her hand up long after he was gone.

And then she fell to the floor. Not crying. Not moving. Just staring. She felt nothing, saw nothing.

Some hours or days later she felt a hand on her.

"Oh, baby, he still loves you. He's a man. He's afraid," drawled the voice of his sister.

She said nothing in return as Alice helped her up and started to her house.

"No! Please," she whimpered.

"Oh, right," Alice said, "I guess we'll go to your man's house."

"No…I wanna go to my house," she said, her voice monotone.

"Okay…I'll stay with you."

"No…I don't want people. I want him," she grabbed her sides in her pain.

"Let's get you home," Alice looked down worriedly.

…

For three days Alice stayed with her.

There was no talking. They was only watching. Waiting.

Finally, on the third day she asked, "Why?"

Tears streamed down her face. Alice scurried to her, relieved. She wanted her to finally feel something. Not be so numb and statue, like. It wasn't healthy.

"Why did he go? Tell him to stay. I won't do it ever again," she whispered incoherently.

Alice squinted and tried to think of an answer that would suffice.

"Honey, he was hurt. He was-is scared. He needs time. You hurt him. He's broken."

"I'm broken! He hurt me. I want him. Please. Call him," she had a crazed, hungry look in her brown eyes.

"I'll-I'll try."

She sat back and closed her eyes.

Alice ran to the kitchen and grabbed her phone.

It rang twice and went to voicemail. No greeting.

She tried three more times and on the fourth time he answered.

"Where. The. Hell. Are. You." She gritted out.

"Why does it matter?" he asked and Alice's throat ached at the way he said it.

"You know why," she replied, "She's broken. She can't do it. She's sat here for almost week doing nothing but asking for you."

"She has Jake," he murmured.

"No…you know that that's not true. She's never had Jacob like she's had you. She doesn't love him," she reasoned.

"Tell Black that." He answered as he ran a hand through his tousled hair.

"Stop being an ass and come to her. She's lost and scared and alone. She wants you. She loves you."

"I… can't," he whimpered brokenly.

"Is that him?!" she sprinted in and grabbed the phone.

"No!" Alice yelled.

"Please," she begged, "Come back. I want you. I need you. I love you." She was hyperventilating, her broken sobs creating a disjointed rhythm.

He felt a tear escape. He wiped it away angrily and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"No," he said, hoarsely and he hung up.

**Strange? Yes. Interesting? Well, that's for you to know and me to find out. Reviewit:)**


	2. In Too Deep

"We had it all in front of us. You were the one. I was in love. But you always hurt the one you lost.  
I couldn't get enough. You were everything that's bad for me. Make no apologies. I'm crushed...  
Black and blue, But you know I'd do it all again for you" We the Kings "All Again For You"

**EPOV:**

Why was she doing this _now_? Right when I was starting to get better. Why the hell was she so bent on screwing up my life?

Bella.

Who knew one word could make a grown man flinch and cower like that. I had always been a coward when it came to Bella Swan. Ever since junior year in fucking high school, she's had me wrapped around her finger.

I had Tanya. I was supposed to be over this, but Bella had to just come back in with Jacob Black. And I just had to go and get jealous and she just had to go looking really sexy in that blue dress she bought a couple months ago when we were together.

See, the thing is, Bella and I had loved each other since junior year in high school.

The other thing was that she and I had hurt each other beyond repair about fourteen times.

Yeah…I counted like a prick. I counted how many times a _girl_ broke _my_ heart.

Now, four years later, I'm still in deep with this woman. I'm trying my damndest not to love her or think about her, but that's not really working.

I knew so much about this girl. We have history and baggage and claim and love and messy shit.

God, I knew everything about her.

I knew that she hated the color pink. She thought it was overrated. I knew that she liked to make cookies out of cake batter and her favorite batter to make was that Funfetti shit. Who the hell makes cookies out of cake batter?

My girl loved fruit snacks. She would always, and I mean always take two packages and separate the reds and purples into one pile and the oranges and yellows into another. She's OCD like that.

I knew what she smelled like in the morning. I knew that she smelled like soap and baby powder and cookies no matter what.

She loved to write and bake.

And I know all of this because…I'm the biggest stalker to grace this planet.

I'm so hopeless and deep that no matter what I'll always come back to her.

But not this time. This time I couldn't because I hurt too much and I felt like I was about to drown.

I was done. With me acting like this. With all this crap. With all of Bella.

**BPOV**

He couldn't be done.

He hadn't called me in three weeks. This was a record.

He always called me. Oh, God. I really screwed this up. I felt a tear run down my face slowly.

I could not do anything without him.

Edward.

Who knew that one word could make a grown woman cringe like that? I had always been scared when it came to Edward. He was brilliant and beautiful and smart and….and ass.

I had loved him since high school. And, okay…I've made a few mistakes along the way.

Like…using Jake to make him jealous. And...using Mike, Eric, and Taylor.

I was a horrible person. I always knew that. I always knew I didn't deserve him. He was better than me. He worked harder than me.

I knew him better than I knew myself.

He played the piano and wrote the most beautiful, complicated music that I had ever heard. He wrote what he felt. I could always tell what he was feeling when he played.

He lives for music. He wanted to be a musician, but he went into medicine because it was more practical. He wants to be a cardiac surgeon.

He runs his left hand through his hair when he doesn't know what to say or is scared.

He wears his iPod ear buds in the wrong ear on purpose because he likes it better that way.

He loves big words and he likes to confuse me with them.

And…most of all he loves to get me angry and mad. And that's exactly what he's doing.

God, I was in deep. Too deep.

**EPOV**

"Eddy-poo-bear," Tanya whined in my ear. I could smell the alcohol on her breath and pushed her away.

"Get off," I muttered.

She laughed drunkenly and went to flirt with the bartender.

I saw a brunette out of the corner of my eye and looked over eagerly only to be disappointed. It wasn't Bella.

Damnit. I needed to stop thinking about her.

I grabbed Tanya and took her to my apartment for a momentary distraction that did not work.

I lay in my bed with Tanya sprawled out over me.

"You know the way out," I said, sitting up and pushing her off. I ran a hand through my hair.

"What? Ed-"

"Get out," I interrupted.

She left, slowly, gathering her clothes. When I heard the door slam I closed my eyes and tugged at my hair until it hurt.

It had been five months since Bella and I had fought. This was the longest we had ever been apart and it was eating me away. I couldn't stand this. I was in physical pain.

I was having sex with random girls, hoping that they could take some of it away.

All these attempts were in vain. All I saw was Bella. Her chestnut curls waving down her back, her deep brown eyes, and her smile. Her beautiful, light-up-the-room smile.

I missed her. I fucking missed her body and her mind and just…being with her.

This had to stop. I didn't love her. I didn't need her. She was just a girl.

I laughed darkly at my denial.

**BPOV**

It's been six months. Six months of watching and waiting and being numb.

Jake was out of the picture. He couldn't deal and I didn't want him. I wanted…I couldn't even say his name anymore.

I was beyond repair. I could barely get up and go to work.

I looked outside. The weather seemed to mock me. The sun was out and the sky a cloudless blue. Children were running and laughing and playing. While_ I_ was in the dark. I hadn't been in the light for a long time. Not since he left.

No matter how hard I tried I could not seem to find where _he _was.

I had asked his whole family and no one would tell me.

They thought we needed time to gather ourselves. I couldn't even gather the strength to smile. How the hell was I supposed to gather _myself_?

He was gone and I didn't know where to find him. But I did know him. He was probably having tons of sex. It was his escape.

I hadn't had any since he left. I couldn't bear it. I did not want another man touching me. I only felt safe and good when Edward touched me.

I sobbed and my chest heaved. I was desperate. I needed to see him.

I was ruining everyone. Rose and Emmett were getting married and I couldn't even enjoy it. No one told me if Edward was going to be there. I didn't think I could take it if he was there.

Seeing him would surely kill me. Not to mention if he brought a girl.

I could just imagine his bronze, untidy hair. His seaweed green eyes, his beautiful lanky body.

I bit a pillow so I wouldn't scream. I was going crazy. That much, I knew.

I heard a brisk knock on my door and slowly got up.

"Bella!" Alice yelled, "I know you're in there. Open up," she pounded.

I opened the door and Alice waltzed in, looking stunned and disgusted.

"What is that smell," she asked, her nose crinkling.

"What smell?" I inquired, defensively.

"Oh, Bella," she sighed, looking over my choice of clothing.

I was wearing one of Edward's shirts. It was the only way I could get by.

"Leave me alone," I said, looking away.

"Bella, its summertime. We should go out. Do something."

"No," I growled, turning away.

Alice frowned. "Don't make me say it."

"What? What do you want to say? Go ahead. Hit me," I goaded.

"He's not gonna come back. He's an ass. He's not. Get that through your head, Bella. So, you need to go out _now _and get over yourself. We have a wedding to plan and you have a life to uphold. So get the hell off your ass and do something."

I stood there, frozen. Her harsh words hit me hard. I licked my chapped lips.

"I'll go get dressed," I said, hoarsely.

She nodded and sat on my couch.

I pulled on a t-shirt and shorts, feeling numb again. I decided to just put on a show for everyone since obviously all the people in my life were fed up my antics.

I would put Edward in a box and only look at it by myself when no one else was around.

I would be alone for the rest of my life. I knew that. I also knew that I was angry at him. At Edward. He left. He left me alone. I know I screwed up, but relationships are to be fought for. And he wasn't willing to fight. So, I would pretend to live and pretend to fight. I had nothing left to win and nothing left to lose.

"**I am standing in the ocean rain  
Rough and ready  
For your deadly game  
I've got nowhere else to go"- We the Kings**

**So…whattcha think?? Tell me the truth. I know…this is different, but I kinda like it. So….review:) **


	3. Attitude

**MUCHO IMPORTANTE: **

**So…I like how only three people are reading my story, or reviewing it, at least. And a HUGE thank you to those three! I really appreciate that. Buutt…I really wish I could get more people reading this and reviewing. SO, TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND REVIEW:) **

**I really don't want to write a story that no one's gonna read. So please tell people. Gracias;)**

"Do you belong to a song?  
Does it drag you along by the tongue at the top of your lungs?  
Are you drunk?  
Have you been drinking?  
Do you below the overpass go with a fifth in your fist  
reminiscing the kiss of a love that just didn't love as much as you did?

Please don't give up, dear walls  
don't let the ceiling fall  
when you belong to a song, salty eyes,  
You belong."-The Matches "Salty Eyes"

**EPOV:**

I flinched as they pinned my leg.

"Fucking watch it," I reprimanded. I wasn't in the mood to be poked and prodded.

"Shut it, Eddie," Emmett growled, "You screwed up Bella which screwed up Rose and some of the wedding. The least you can fucking do is get measured for a tux."

I flinched when he said Bella. God…I missed her.

And yet, I was bringing Tanya with me to the wedding.

Jasper, Rose's brother and one of my best friends, told me I shouldn't do it, that it would break Bella.

I was going to do it to make her fucking jealous. Then, she would come back.

Knowing Bella she probably already had a list of guys that she was considering. She'd find just the right one to set me off and the wedding would end in disaster.

Fuckmylife.

**BPOV**

"What?"

"It's true."

"What the hell?"

"Bell, it's true."

I felt a tear escape and I didn't know if it was from happiness or pain.

Edward was coming to the wedding and he was brining that whore Tanya.

Great. That was just the icing on this fucking wedding cake.

What was I going to do?

As I could see it I only had three options.

I could play nice and not let Tanya feel my wrath.

I could ignore him and not look his way at all..or

I could find an unsuspecting guy, use him to make Edward jealous, and end up seducing Edward.

Hmmm…I think I'll take three for five hundred, please.

This would be too good. I smirked and Alice groaned.

"You know if you make him jealous he'll ruin the wedding," she warned.

"No, silly, he won't. I'm gonna be a good girl," I replied, looking through my phone.

Newton.

It was perfect.

**EPOV**

I walked out of my class and sighed. I was going through my first year of med school and it was slowly killing me.

"Edward," Kate trilled out.

I think I had fucked Kate about two weeks ago. I couldn't recall.

"So…what are you doing this weekend?"

"Going to a wedding," I murmured, thinking of Bella.

"Oh, well, do you need-"

"No," I cut her off and strode away.

I was so fucking nervous about this. I knew the wedding was going to be tense. Poor Emmett and Rose.

I growled as I got into my Volvo and drove to my apartment to find Emmett and Jazz sitting on my couch.

"Ever heard of knocking or asking to come over," I grunted.

"Now what kind of person would I be if I did all that shit?" Jasper drawled out.

"A decent one," I muttered.

"We need to talk, fucker," Emmett said, throwing his arm around me and taking a sip of beer.

"About?" I asked, shortly.

"That attitude of yours, Mr."

"We know you're nervous about Bella, but Rose said if you ruined her wedding she'd…well, she'd rip off your nuts and burn them." Jazz explained.

"Her words exactly," Emmett added.

"I don't care about Bella. I won't ruin your wedding and I most definitely will be keeping my balls," I said, with an air of arrogance.

"Alright," Emmett said, easily.

But Jasper kept staring at me, shaking his head. "Whatever you say."

I heard a knock at the door and Jazz looked down. Emmett's eyes rounded in excitement.

I frowned at their behavior and opened the door.

What. The. Hell.

Fuckme.

**Whoever could it be?;) Review and I'll update faster. And tell friends!!! Also, this is the last chapter that I switch POV's like that. **


	4. Surprise

**Hey…what's crackin? So, I now have about four or five people reviewing. So, I suppose that's better, but come one guys, help an author out;) tell people:)) Now, then I wanted to clarify some things:**

**First: These characters are all around 21 in my head. So, I'm gonna say 21 or 22. Because, if we're getting technical, they were 17 when they met in their junior year. Four years later would make them 21 and almost finished with college. Edward is already in Med School. That's kind of pushing it, I know, but it's my story:)**

**Second: Yes, ****CullenLuver333****, that was you;)**

**Third: Not many people are reviewing, but I'm going to continue because I'm having too much fun:)**

**BPOV**

I didn't know where the hell Alice and Rose were taking me. I thought it was just going to another shoe fitting or picking out table cloth.

I should have known what they were up too.

Alice pulled up to an expensive looking apartment that really looked more like a penthouse.

It was a pretty gray and was about three windows across.

"Where are we?" I asked.

Rose fluffed up her hair, studiously ignoring me. Alice started fixing my makeup and hair.

"What-Alice? What's going on?"

"Nothing. God, Bella, why can't you ever _try_ to look decent?" she huffed.

"I do try," I said, defensively.

Rose snorted, "Bell, you haven't been trying in a while."

I looked down and tried not to cry at her comment. I knew why I wasn't trying. Ever since he left I'd had no reason to.

"Sorry," Rose muttered, pulling me into a hug," I'm just stressed.

Yeah, it must be so stressful to have a man love you and marry you. I tried to smile like I understood. Even though I didn't.

"Well…" Alice sighed, giving up on me, "That's as good as I can get it for now."

Rose ushered me out of the car and I followed them up to the entrance.

I gaped as we entered the lobby. I felt as if I were in a five star hotel. Everything was covered in gold's and reds. It was all so eloquently put together that I felt instantly out of place. Whoever lived here had money. Lots of it. I didn't fit.

A young woman walked over to us and gave us a smile that hurt_ my_cheeks. She was young and had her blonde hair cropped short. She was gorgeous.

"Can I help you ladies with anything," she asked, glancing at Rose the longest.

I couldn't blame her. I would have too. Rosalie was the epitome of beauty with her long blonde hair and her sea blue eyes. Not to mention her model figure. I couldn't help but glance over too, in jealously.

"Um…" Rose said, looking panicked towards Alice.

Alice smiled brightly and said, "Oh, no thank you. Just visiting some friends."

Hmmm…I knew that face. What was she doing? They led me to the elevator and Rose pushed level fifteen. The highest level to be exact.

I was starting to get jittery.

"What in the hell are you guys doing?" I asked when the fat guy left the elevator.

"Nothing," they purred in unison.

I stared at them for a second, unsure.

"I'm leaving," I said shortly as I I pushed the floor button.

"No!" Rose yelled.

"Not yet, Missy," Alice scolded.

I heard the ding of the elevator and Alice dragged me onto the floor.

I only saw one door which meant that this whole floor was one room.

God…who needed this much space. Whoever the guy was he was sure to be a douche.

Rose went up to the door and knocked.

Alice was still trying to fix my hair and quickly turned around.

I about had a hernia when I saw who answered the door.

"Surprise." Rose muttered.

Fuck.

**Not long…I know…and to end it right there? HAHAHAHAHA…Yes, I know that was mean, but the next chapter is almost done. Review and I'll update tomorrow:)**


	5. Pain

**Nothing to say here...Just review and don't hate me. Oh, and don't get used to me updating everyday. I'm off off school this week:)**

**BPOV**

"Help, I have done it again  
I have been here many times before  
Hurt myself again today  
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend  
Hold me, wrap me up  
Unfold me  
I am small  
and needy  
Warm me up  
And breathe me"- Sia – "Breathe Me"

Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.

Why in Christ's name would they do this to me?

Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.

He looked beautiful. So damned beautiful.

His mouth was popped open in a surprised "o" shape. His hair was a bronze mess that I wanted to desperately run my fingers through and his eyes, his beautiful emerald green eyes. I could see the scar above his left eyebrow that he got from wrestling with Emmett when they were four. I could see the little cleft in his chin. His five' clock shadow was forming under his chin.

I could also see his tension. His hands were clenched tight in fists. I shivered as I saw his jaw tighten. I loved when he did that. It was so sexy. I used to make him mad on purpose just to see his jaw clench.

His eyes were roaming my form greedily. Well, fucker, it was nice to see that I was missed.

Alice cleared her throat and I realized that for the last few minutes our friends had watched Edward and I eye-fuck each other.

I had to be mature. I had to be mature. I had to be fucking mature.

"Bella!" Emmett bellowed, "We've missed ya!" he picked me up and hugged me to his chest. He carried me into what I guessed was Edward's new apartment. Alice went to Jasper and gave him a quick peck only to glance over at me again. Emmett set me down.

My eyed traveled over the room. It was Edward in a nutshell. Elegant, yet, messy. I sighed and tried not to sob as I looked over at him.

He was looking at me with such an intense gaze that I couldn't look away. His green eyes turned into a melting fire as he looked into, what felt like, the depths of my soul.

I felt myself go weak and I had to sit down.

Sheesh. I was such a drama queen.

Damn him and his green eyes.

Jazz and Emmett turned on the TV while Rose and Alice started talking.

I couldn't take this. What did they want us to do? Pretend we were fine and normal. That nothing was wrong.

Well, fuck that.

I stood up and started walking around his apartment.

Everyone was silent again.

If they were expecting me to be a good girl about this then they had another thing coming.

I walked down the short hall, passed a small bar and landed in the kitchen which was dawned with tans and pastel colors. There were black leather seats that framed a brown circular table.

I felt rather than heard Edward following me slowly.

I turned to him and gave him a smirk.

"You're doing well for yourself, Edward," I drawled out, running a finger on the counter.

He grimaced, not saying anything. Fine, then. He was going to let me get this out of my system.

I sauntered down the other side of the apartment.

The heads of our friends snapped in our direction and followed us until we were out of distance.

I couldn't believe this. He had everything. He had grown up. I could tell by looking at him, while I was still the same immature Bella that wanted her way all the time. In six months he had gotten his shit together and bought our dream apartment in which he was probably sexing it up with various girls. But I wasn't bitter.

Yeah…right. I didn't care that skanks were sexing up my boyfriend.

I saw a great amount of light coming from the right and decided to start there. I'd save his room for last. I had already passed two bathrooms and a guest room. They held nothing of interest.

When I entered the light filled room I gasped and almost began to cry.

It was the library Edward and I had always talked about.

Since he had known me, I had always loved books more than anything. I didn't have any book shelves when we had first met and I had about one hundred books lined up in a neat row against a wall. He would make fun of me for not having any shelves and promised me that one day he would build me a proper library for my entire book collection.

I felt a tear escape and I tried to wipe it away and will myself not to cry.

It was just absolutely beautiful. The room was filled with earthy tones. There were chestnut shelves surrounding each wall and a dark brown chandelier hanging from the ceiling. A huge couch and matching love seat evened out the right and left sides of the room. A huge window filtered in all the light. It was the perfect library.

I walked over to the shelves and fingered the books reverently.

He had none of my favorites…so maybe this wasn't what I had thought. Maybe he just wanted a library. Like a normal person. Of course he didn't make this for me.

I whirled around to face him and he was leaning against the door frame, gauging my reactions.

I forced a smile and he frowned.

"Bella-" he started.

"Nope…not done with the tour," I choked out.

The last door was in my sight and I tried to breath. This was it.

_His_ room.

At least the tour had kept me from looking at him so much. But it really couldn't be help, my looking at him. He was just too beautiful.

I opened the door slowly and took a deep breath.

Inhale. Exhale.

I opened my eyes and saw that his bed was unmade and he still had the same bedspread that he did when I was last with him. This made me relax for some reason. I felt like he was still my Edward.

But then I saw the panties on the dresser door.

I knew he was having sex, but seeing the evidence like that…it hurt.

I gasped out and made a strange mewling noise.

I staggered slightly.

I felt Edward's arms around me, trying to hold me together, but it was too late. It was far too late.

"Bella…Bella, love, we need-"

"No!" I roared, scrambling away from him. He looked shocked at my outburst.

"Don't touch me! You…you cheated on me! You…you left, you bastard!" I screamed.

Anger flashed in his green eyes, making them look like ice.

"No…no, Bella, you know that's not true. I told you…I told you that if you saw Jake again that-"

"Do you hear yourself? You were acting like a cave man, telling me I can't see people!"

"Bella, you cheated on _me_ with _him_!" his breathing was labored like my own. Our faces were inches apart.

"No! No, I did not. He kissed me last year. You told me you were okay. You said you knew it meant nothing!" I accused.

"How was that a guarantee when you went to see him every day?"

"It's a guarantee because you should trust me. I'm your girlfriend!"

"Were. You were my girlfriend." He corrected.

I flinched at his words. "How-"

"No…I caught you kissing him six months ago!"

Oh god. No. I froze. Jake and I had been friends since forever and he had recently tried to come onto me more than once. He just didn't get the hint. He'd tried to kiss me again, but I wouldn't let him.

"No…no Edward, you don't know-"

"I think I do," he finished, standing his ground.

"You can't play Mr. Innocent here," I countered. It was his turn to flinch.

"You know-"

"No…no I don't."

"There is more to this than what we're talking about," he said, running a hand through his hair.

"You're right. There is," I sighed, defeated, "Well, I have to go."

I was in far too much pain to sit here any longer.

I walked out of the room and he stayed where he was.

I ran out the door without even glancing at my so called friends and drove myself to one place that could possibly soothe the pain.

The pain that I had inflected on myself and Edward.

The pain I so righteously deserved.

The pain I couldn't escape.

**Reviews are much obliged.**


	6. Think

**Happy Late Birthday, ROBERT!!!! I love you:))))))…a lot. **

**It's short…deal:)**

**No song for this one. **

**EPOV**

I just stood there.

I stood there like a flippin' idiot and watched my girl walk away.

I felt rooted to my spot. I couldn't move much less think about what had just went down.

"What the hell, man?" Emmett asked his eyes wide.

Jazz sauntered in behind him, looking amused.

"That right there was E and B at their best," he drawled.

I flipped him off and pinched the bridge of my noise.

"Why in fucks name did you allow this to happen?" I asked teeth clenched.

"Whoa, man, it was all Alice," Emmett blamed. Jazz kicked him in the shin at the accusation. Emmett started jumping around like a gorilla in pain.

"I wasn't even prepared. She…she looked-"

"Like shit," Emmett finished.

I saw red. I pushed Emmett up against the wall. "She. Did. Not. Look. Like. Shit." I spit out.

No one could say that about my girl.

Emmett chuckled and Jazz had to refrain me from punching him.

"Get the hell out," I ordered hoarsely.

"We'll leave you to your brooding ways," Jasper sniped as he slammed the door.

Fuck them.

Bella.

My Bella.

She looked tired and too skinny and so beautiful that it hurt to look at her.

The way she walked around my apartment. The way she turned around to glance at me. I could barley refrain myself from jumping her.

She'd sauntered around my whole place looking like a seductress, but I could tell she was hurting. Especially when she saw the library. I knew she was looking for any indication that it was for her, but I didn't give her anything to work with or suspect.

I ran a hand through my hair and blew out a sigh. What was I going to do at that wedding?

I couldn't do this again. It hurt too much.

It hurt to love her and it sure as hell hurt to be broken by her.

My phone buzzed and I glanced over at it. The screen lit up with "Tanya".

"Shit," I muttered.

I hit ignore and tried to organize my head with no success.

I went out of my room, grabbed my keys, and hauled it to the Volvo.

I needed a drive…and a stiff one.

I pulled out of the garage and sped to a Seven Eleven and grabbed a pack of cigarettes.

I had quite a while ago, but I felt as if the occasion called for it.

I lit up and inhaled deeply. I leaned back against the head rest in my car.

Bella.

Damnit.

I closed my eyes and tried to think of something…anything else.

School. No.

Tanya. Hellno.

Scotch. Eh.

Bella. Fuck.

My mind was such a screwed up mess.

I pulled out of my parking spot, almost running over a guy. He flipped me off and I ignored him, not in the mood for a fight.

I didn't consciously know where I was going.

I didn't really know why I turned left and drove until the buildings were gone.

I didn't know why I felt a physical pull towards this direction.

Oh, yeah….Bella.

I should have known.

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